With temperatures in the mid-70s, thunderstorms and even a small tornado in the Parkersburg area on Christmas Eve, Santa was probably glad to put West Virginia in his sleigh's rear-view following his most recent gift-giving run to the Mountain State.
But instead of being able to chill out for a long winter's rest in his familiar arctic climate, the jolly, bearded one is dealing with home-place temperatures that are warmer than places like Chicago and Oklahoma City. According to the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration, it was more than 50 degrees warmer than normal at the North Pole Wednesday morning, with the temperature rising to a balmy, above-freezing 33 degrees.
Maybe next year, those on his "naughty" list will be getting lithium ion batteries in their stockings instead of coal.
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The Thanksgiving to Christmas season is the peak time for donating items of nonperishable foods to food banks and community pantries. Most of those who take part in food drives to restock food bank shelves donate thoughtfully and generously, but a few donors tend to overlook things like expirations dates, major dents or rust spots on donated cans of food, or the appropriateness of foods being given to the needy.
"We must check every can, box, or bag of food for rust, dents and expiration dates," wrote one Kanawha Valley food pantry volunteer. "This can take a large amount of time, and much is thrown away due to the fact that it is not fit for human consumption."
Food bank donations should not be used "as a time to clean out the fridge and pantry at your house. People don't need a can of food that looks like it was in the flood and expired in the year 2000," according to the volunteer. "Do you really think you are helping someone by giving them something you won't even eat yourself? It always amazes me as to what people donate, but this year took the cake."
Better make that English-style pudding, rather than cake.
To illustrate the point, the volunteer included a photo of a can of a Heinz product received at the food pantry bearing the unsavory name of - and I'm not making this up - Spotted Dick. A little yellow tag to the right of the product's label lets consumers know that the Heinz version of Spotted Dick is microwavable.
I learned from Wikipedia that the product "is a popular British pudding made with suet and dried fruit, usually currants and raisins." The cake-like pudding gets the "spotted" part of its name from the raisins and currants suspended in the loaf, while "the origin of the second part of the name is more obscure," although the word "was widely used as a term for pudding (in Britain) in the 19th Century."
Now that the Thanksgiving-Christmas season is over and donations have tapered off, food banks and pantries need nonperishable food items more than ever. Most needed are cans of high-protein foods, like canned chicken, tuna, salmon and beans, or plastic jars of peanut butter, along with canned soups, fruits and vegetables.
If you feel like giving something spotted, make it pinto beans.
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The good news is that former Turing Pharmaceuticals chief Martin Shkreli was arrested two weeks ago for securities fraud. The bad news is that his $5 million bond, unlike the prices he charged for vital yet relatively inexpensively produced drugs, hasn't yet gone up 5,000 percent.